Most couples experience what is known as the “honeymoon phase” at the very beginning of their relationship. Over the years, however, their excitement and passion start to wain as family, bills and other obligations come into play. If you are in one of those relationships where the romance has seemed to fade, then use these five ideas to rebuild your relationship.
A Quiet Getaway is the Way to Go
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Couples should aim to get away for at least a week each year. The problem with this plan is that they often choose to go to an expensive location where there might be a crowd. Therefore, they spend more time standing in line than talking to each other. Each individual can end up lost in their own thoughts as they stare aimlessly at a tourist attraction.
Do not let this happen to your relationship. Instead, choose to get away to a quiet location where there will be only a handful of other people. After all, vacationing in a secluded and peaceful place is an intimate experience. It can be a great opportunity to work through any intimacy issues without the interference of others. It can also be an excellent opportunity to truly communicate and develop goals for your relationship. Regardless of where you go, make sure to spend some quality time with each other and make communication a priority.
There is something about giving to others that often bring couples closer together because they are sharing a mutual interest. It can be as simple as helping deliver meals to the elderly once a week. On the other hand, it can be an elaborate trip to help elephants in Thailand or teach orphans in the Dominican Republic.
Volunteering is a powerful bonding experience. Look for an opportunity where you can share it as a couple and not be put in separate groups because of different skills. Volunteering also lets you understand what your mate values in life. Just the mere process of picking out the right opportunity can be a very eye-opening experience. Volunteering may give you an opportunity to try something new. If you are both religious, then there are many church service projects that you can do with your spouse. You can further develop your marital relationship while bonding with your church community.
As you experience success as a volunteer, you may find that you have new inspiration to try something different in your marriage. You are likely to develop a new appreciation for what your spouse is able to do when you see them volunteering. Couples sometimes start thinking that things are better for everyone else. Volunteering gives you the opportunity to understand how blessed you are as a couple and as a family.
Attend a Marriage Retreat
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A marriage retreat can offer a fantastic opportunity to work on your relationship. This can be a precious time to focus on the one you love without being interrupted by your best friend’s emergency at midnight or your toddler climbing into bed with you at 3 AM. Many couples cherish the chance to recharge their batteries while devoting time to their marriages. Many find it helpful to be surrounded by other couples who are experiencing similar issues. These marriage retreats are often a great opportunity to let your real emotions show in an environment where you are supported.
The key to finding a great marriage retreat is to find the right leader. Look for a leader whom you can respect and who is honest enough to say that they do not have the perfect marriage, but they are striving to make it better each day. The right marriage retreat leader has a natural way of seeing the strengths of a relationship. They are trained to inspire you to keep building a stronger relationship each day.
Weekly Date Nights
Make a weekly date night a top priority in your life. Set aside the time to meet with each other once a week. You may want to go out to eat without the kids, your friends, and your in-laws. On the other hand, there are many fun activities that you may want to do in your vicinity. Keep it fresh by changing up activities regularly. Date nights provide a great way to keep in frequent contact with each other as you race through life. For other couples, it is a great time to fall in love with each other all over again.
In the spirit of rekindling the initial sparks of the honeymoon phase of the relationship, look for ways to take a trip down memory road as you plan your dates. Whether you revisit the site of your first kiss or break out your his-and-hers wedding jerseys from your reception, sentimental gestures are a great way to celebrate your continued commitment to each other. A meaningful date night can often be the spark that couples need to reconnect with each other and experience passion again.
Stay Close to Home
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While traveling and working together can be great for a relationship, it is often the little things that you do on a daily basis that matter most. Therefore, it may be time to institute a couple’s ritual in your home. This can be as simple as having a quiet conversation over morning coffee. You and your spouse may want to commit to starting the day by saying something positive about the other person. Then, tell your spouse about something you are looking forward to doing that day and listen attentively as they share about their day. Ask about anything that has puzzled or bothered you. It can be something about yourself. Next, make one small request. Finally, share with each other a hope about the future.
Building a strong relationship with another person takes work. It does not matter if you have been married one week or 50 years. Spending quality time together is a great place to start. You each owe it to the other one to commit time to rekindle your love affair on a regular basis. It should happen in the home on a routine basis, but it often takes more than that to remind you why your spouse is so important in your life. Enhance the experience by going on a date night once a week. Then, at least yearly, get away to somewhere quiet where you can concentrate on falling in love all over again. Remember that there is no shame in asking for help, so consider attending a marriage retreat. Finally, recognize your spouse’s talents by volunteering together. Your marriage depends on you and your spouse working on it regularly.