If you know me then you know that I am pleasantly plump. What I lack in height I make up for in curves. And to tell you the truth it has taken me most of my adulthood to finally accept my curves and the few extra pounds on the scale. I know I am beautiful both inside and out, and my husband is constantly telling me how gorgeous I am even after a hardcore work out or tearing the house apart during a cleaning spree. I’m talking sweat streaming down my face, my boobs flopping all over the place because they’re not restrained in a bra while I’m doing house chores, hair frizzy as hell – and this man thinks I’m gorgeous!
Before I met my husband, I dated skinny guys, fit guys, stocky guys, etc and it was fun, but I felt self conscious at times, because I know what his friends were thinking. The truth is, big girls and skinny girls, we’re all the same. We all have a butt, we all have breasts, we all breathe, and eat, and work out, we all kiss and have sex, we all love – the same – THE SAME. This post is in response to an article titled, “15 Thoughts Every Guy Should Have When Dating a Bigger Woman.” I initially didn’t want to link to it and give it more views, but I think it’s important for you every woman and man to read the original article and this one in order to understand what is being done here. This is a longer than normal piece for me, but please read it through. So let’s get down to business shall we?
15 Thoughts Every Guy Shouldn’t Have When Dating a Bigger Woman
15. Your Date Is Tough
“Well, a guy that dates a plus-sized girl is usually not one of those guys. This guy wants a girl to hang out with that is tough, and can take care of herself.” The truth is a guy should look for any woman who can take care of herself and also wants to be held when scared or hurt. If you think that all plus-sized girls are tough, well you’re probably right, and since we are, and you’re dating us, please respect that we can drop kick you at a moment’s notice if you ever disrespect us. The skinny girl reading this, I know you’re thinking the same thing. Don’t ever let any guy think you’re weak – even if you are!
14. My Girl Can Cook
“Big girls usually get big for a reason, and usually that reason has something to do with food.” Really? REALLY?! Dude let’s go over some health language that you may not be familiar with, PCOS, Hashimoto’s Diseas, Type 1 and 2 Diabetes, Muscular Dystrophy, MS, etc. All things that can cause weight gain sans food. And if you think that only fat girls can cook then you’re looking for girls in the wrong place. I have this beautiful, gorgeous twig of a friend that can cook her ass off and put me to shame and I claim to be a G in the kitchen!
13. Calorie Counting is Out
“…this is no problem at all with the plus-sized girlfriend; just give her a ring and tell her that you are on your way home and are picking up a large pie. The only problem is you are going to have to buy two.” Whoa! Wait a minute their buddy! If you want to pick up a pizza pie or two you better eat that shit somewhere else! If I made that chicken cutlet and vegetables you better take your ass right home for dinner. Chances are you’re way over your 2000 calorie limit as it is, and I’m going to make sure you stay healthy, because I don’t want a schlub next to me! So go ahead and have your pizza pie or two but not in my house!
12. It Is Good For HIS Confidence
I’m not even going to quote anything off the article, because all I have to say is, if your man is with YOU to build up HIS confidence, girl you need to run! Run right now! Don’t even take anything with you just go! Whether you are skinny or perfectly plump, get the eff outta there! No one should be using you as their emotional punching bag. This IS ABUSE! No one should be using you to practice their game, you’re better than that and deserve so much more! Guys I swear, if I ever find out that any of the men I know have done this or do this, you will be outed on my site! If you’re a dude reading this and you have low confidence, go to a therapist, work on it, but don’t use women!
11. He Might Like Them Better
“While so many people look at a guy with a plus-sized woman and feel kind of bad for him, very few actually seem to understand that a lot of guys actually really like women that look this way.” Look what way? How do we look? Like women, beautiful, confident, sexy? Why would someone feel bad for you if you’re dating a hot and sexy woman? How does that even make sense? The only time anyone should feel sorry for a guy dating someone is if he’s dating someone that is offensive and abusive to him. See what I mean, none of this makes sense!
10. They Are Easy To Talk To
“One of the main things a guy dating a bigger chick is often thinking is how easy his girl is to talk to.” Alright folks, I know many bigger women who are uptight and I know many thinner women who are super easy to talk to. Again what the hell does weight have to do with anything? “They are used to working their personality to make up for what many guys perceive to be flaws.” Work their personality? Flaws? Mofo, let me tell you about your personality and your flaws right off the bat! Any person who needs to “work it” has issues. If a girl – of any size – can’t be themselves around you then you need to go.
9. Picking A Place to Eat is Easy
“She is going to probably be willing to go pretty much anywhere you want her to, at any time.” Okay for starters, I don’t like run of the mill Mexican Restaurants, if you’r white working in that kitchen, I’m not eating there. I’m not a big fan of American Food, so no BBQ pits for me. I don’t like vegetarian food either, so no Vegan restaurants, the list gets longer, shall I continue? In actuality bigger women are picky eaters, why? Because WE DO care about what we put in our bodies.
8. The Cuddling Is The Best
“A plus-sized girl is going to tend to be happy for that sort of attention, no doubt about that at all.” Dude, you need to get your brain checked. My husband loves cuddling way more than I do.I hate feeling restrained, I like to be free just like my bra-less boobs! Attention? So bigger girls crave extra attention? That’s news to me since we are trying to avoid your sideways glance and murmuring.
7. She Is A Built-In Workout Buddy
“Sure, she might lag a little bit at first, but all that does is take a lot of pressure off your shoulders, and that is never a bad thing.” Lag a little? With Asthma and all I can run circles around you. I have a routine and if you’re going to work out with me, YOU need to be able to keep up WITH ME! You think that what you do is hard? HA! I can do a split and lift twice my weight with little to no effort. I’m not bragging, but oh who am I kidding? I’m totally bragging and so are my fellow plus-sized sisters!
6. There Is Less Pressure On How You Look
Nope, there is, in fact, more pressure on how you look. See #13. I do not want a schlub next to me. You need to pay special attention to your facial hair and hair do. Your body odor – must not exist, and your clothes need to be wrinkle-free. Oh is that too much for you to handle? I will nag and I will buy your clothes, why? Because my man needs to look and feel just as good as I do.
5. Jealousy Is A Thing Of The Past
“And truth be told, this is why a lot of guys like dating a woman that they don’t have to worry about unwanted eyes.” Uhm, last month, my husband almost got into a brawl with some dude at Karaoke for staring at me too long. I’m not saying he’s uber jealous, but he knows what he’s got and it’s all his. If you think that you shouldn’t worry about unwanted eyes with your plus-sized girl, then you’re wrong, because she’s hot, sexy, and confident and she knows it, and hopefully, she’s flaunting it!
4. They Tend To Be Funny
I’m just going to drop this here and walk away: “You mean, let me understand this … cuz I … maybe its me, maybe I’m a little fucked up maybe. I’m funny how? I mean funny, like I’m a clown? I amuse you? I make you laugh? I’m here to fuckin’ amuse you? Whattya you mean funny? Funny how? How am I funny?” – Goodfellas
3. They Tend To Be Eager To Please
“While so many women want a guy to put her up on a pedestal, when you are dating a plus-sized girl it is often the exact opposite.” Nuh uh! I don’t want to be put on a pedestal nor am I putting you on a pedestal. You need your confidence built up, again, see a therapist.
2. You Can Take Her Anywhere
“This is not to say that most hot women are not agreeable of course. Actually, who am I kidding, that is exactly what I mean.” So you’re saying that a plus-sized woman is not hot and that she will only be used as a sidekick? Not a partner in crime, but someone you can boss around and get those hard to reach places? Dude listen up, I’m hot, my other big girls are hot too, and more than likely, we’ll be using you to put lotion on our hard to reach places, you know since we have extra love handles and what not.
1. They Are Easy To Ask Out
“It is hard to ask out a woman, so sometimes a guy ends up asking someone he is pretty sure that he will not get rejected by, which is why he asks out a plus-sized woman in the first place.” Whoa, whoa, whoa! WHOA! So you’re saying that plus-sized women will eagerly accept your invitation to go out? HAHAHAHAHA! OMG! I think I peed a little! Oh snap, I am funny! WOW! Okay, let me start off by saying that any woman who knows her worth will NOT say yes to the first guy that crosses her path. Again any woman, plus-sized or thin is not to be used as your confidence builder.
Ladies and Gents, please get your stuff together. Big girls aren’t any different than skinny girls. We have priorities, we all do, and satisfying a man’s need to build his confidence on our shoulders is not one of them. Guys if you like pleasantly plump girls, go for it, if you like thin girls go for it, but do not compare them. We are not ashamed of who we are. We have worked hard to build the confidence that we do have and we do not need a man to tear it down in any way, shape or form. Please ladies #loveyourselves #lovewhatmatters #loveisntasize